Bristol Palin is Accusing Levi Johnston of Rape

Excerpts from Bristol Palin’s memoirs have been released and surprisingly very little people are concerned with the fact that a.) someone published Bristol Palin’s memoirs and b.) she pretty much accuses Levi Johnston of raping her virginity away because that’s the only way a good, Christian-raised girl would have sex out of wedlock. Us Magazine reports:

In her new autobiography, Not Afraid of Life: My Journey So Far, the 20-year-old single mom reveals that, while drunk for the very first time, she lost her virginity to Levi Johnston during a camping trip.
Palin says she woke up alone in her tent, with no recollection as to what happened. Johnston, meanwhile, “talked with his friends on the other side of the canvas.”
When she confronted him about their sexual encounter, Johnston, now 21, told Palin what she wanted to hear: they wouldn’t have sex again until they were married.
But, Palin writes, they became intimate again shortly after.

Guess he was good at it.

Granted, Bristol Palin’s mom wrote a book comprised entirely of easily-refuted bullshit anecdotes and made millions of dollars off of it, when you claim someone had sex with you without your knowledge while you’re passed out drunk, that’s called rape. Or more importantly in this case, libel. Because, seriously, if Levi Johnston actually did rape Bristol in a tent, Sarah Palin is notoriously vindictive and likes to shoot things from helicopters. My thoughts on her politics aside, I’m pretty sure Mama Grizzly would’ve buried this kid under a glacier before she let people think Alaska isn’t Deadwood with snow.